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about     peas & carrots


2November
2006

he could eat you with a fork and spoon

maura @ 10:55 pm

I am completely in love with my new librarytastic life, but I must admit that there are a few things I miss about my old job:

1. a paycheck
2. my coworkers
3. the (relatively) inexpensive + easy-to-obtain health + life insurance for me + my family

So we applied for life insurance recently. We filled out the forms and answered invasive questions over the phone and were told we would need to give blood and urine samples. I was expecting to have to go to a lab to donate my fluids but the other day we got a call that no, a nurse would come to us.

This set off a huge paranoia fest in my brain. I mean, who’s to say that the nurse who takes our blood + pee is REALLY affiliated with the insurance company? How do we know it’s not just someone walking in off the street (albeit with all the right equipment and paperwork)? Clearly I have watched one too many X-Files episodes or something*, but the whole thing just seems really really weird to me.

ANYway, today the nurse came. She was 3 hrs. late, so I really REALLY had to pee by the time she got here. I had to pee in a cup and pour it into two little vials. We had to take the trash out right then and there because we could totally see Gus saying “what’s that little cup for?” and reaching in to grab it. The nurse was not a good phlebotomist and now I have a bruise.

And I still don’t understand why they couldn’t have just sent us to a lab.

* Jonathan says I should mention “something about clones and doppelgangers and whatnot”, so I am. You know, how they could make those things of me with the blood samples.


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