spare parts express

maura @ 9:31 pm

We’re 33.3% through NaBloPoMo, only 66.7% to go! In honor of making it to the 1/3rd mark I thought I’d do today’s post photo essay style.

Today’s topic is:

The Most Bestest* Public Bathroom in Manhattan**

* Because for some reason after class this evening I described the burgers at Shake Shack to a fellow student as “the most bestest burgers you have ever eaten.” Ah, Fridays, when the rush of the week smacks you full in the brain.

** There might be nicer bathrooms in the other boroughs, I haven’t really had a chance to check.

If you are ever in need of a restroom and are within walking distance of Bryant Park, just head on over to the public toilets on the northeast corner of the park, tucked in next to the NYPL’s Humanities and Social Sciences Research Library.

The luxury of this bathroom is unbelievable, especially for those of us accustomed to the toilet-seat-(and-paper)-free, soap-less and stinky cabins that pass for public bathrooms at (some) playgrounds. So I’ve documented today’s excursion photographically for you. Prepare to be dazzled!

Here’s a shot of the exterior. Looks pretty standard, right? Note the lounging tourists.

Wait, are those fresh flowers?! Why yes, they are. A whole ginormous urnfull, in fact!

There was a gaggle of young gals availing themselves of the facilities, so while waiting in line I snapped this detail of the tilework.

Just look at this sink: more fresh flowers, marble counters, SOAP and automatic RUNNING WATER…my god, it’s like you’re at a hotel or something!

And the stalls, they are made of real laminated wood! Not dented metal with grafitti sharpied everywhere (”Mommy, what does s-k-a-n-k-y h-o spell?”)

But no, gentle readers, it gets better…

The toilet, it has a magical red button, which when pressed causes a fresh AND sanitary seat cover to be magically dispensed for you, like magic!

Last, but not least, the automatic hand dryers, which are made by a company called Xlerator (bonus points for spelling!). Indeed, they must be powered by rocket sauce, because the air blast is so mighty that it pushes the skin on your hand like some crazy astronaut g-force or something (and actually DRIES your hands, rather than just pushing the water around like those inferior, non-Xlerated dryers).

Tomorrow we will return to our regularly scheduled, un-illustrated blathering. But I leave you with this, a view of the urban splendor around Bryant Park on this beautiful day in the city (sunny, high around 60F):

you’ll freeze and catch a cold

maura @ 10:55 pm

Tired, tired, tired. Thursdays are long days. Take Gus to school. Come home. Try to cram as much (mostly school) work as possible into the next 5 hrs. Head back to pick him up. Often we’ll go to a playground near his old school, so he can run around like a screaming banshee and play the poop game* with the other kids. Then we rush home around 5pm so I can grab dinner (usually eaten while walking to the subway) and get to class by 6:30. Home by 9:30, then settle onto the sofa and watch Weeds.

* You know, the poop game, in which assorted 4-5 yr olds throw themselves in a big pile down a spiral slide, yelling “we’re flushing ourselves down the toilet!” Good times.

Except Weeds is over so tonight it’ll be Veronica Mars. Which is a longer show, so it’s a good thing I’m getting this post written on the visor on the subway now, isn’t it?

Today’s work went really well, actually. I was really attentive and efficient and not tired at all, and I got a crapload done. Wish I could bottle whatever it was (it wasn’t extra coffee, I swear!).

Whoops, now I’m home and at the computer, but Jonathan has too much work to do to watch VM tonight. Bummer, Pee Wee.

raised by wolves

maura @ 11:05 pm

And for tonight, because it is late and I am too afraid to think of the many school-related things I have to do, lest my head explode, here’s a random list of things:

1. [poking her head out of the hole of life where there's no time for music] The kids are right: Voxtrot, they are indeed good. And I could have even seen them play last night or the night before! Oh, I am SO good at getting a clue one day late.

2. Man, I need to get me to an indiepop blog or start listening to WFMU online again or something. I miss music! And listening to (and singing along with) “Panic in Detroit” and “Cracked Actor” on my 20-year-old Aladdin Sane tape in the car on the way to get Gus from school is not cutting it.

3. Jonathan just said “You could bake a loaf of bread every single fucking day! You can scoff all you want, Maura, but you can’t have any of the bread!” I leave it to you to discover which story in today’s paper inspired those statements. (Oh, okay, I’ll give you the link.)

4. Really, why do I even try to think of things to write in this blog at all? I should just give the running record of what Jonathan says. This minute: “What happened to all of that pie at the Harvest Festival (Gus’ school fundraiser) last weekend?! The cleanup committee CLEANED UP, that’s what!”

5. My hair is really bugging me recently, making me once again wonder about buzzing it. I think I’m still too chicken, but I did decide that when I am old, I will have dreadlocks. Or shave my head. Or both! Dreads seemed like a good plan because I am forever twisting my hair and with dreads you actually NEED to do that. But then I looked on a how-to-make-dreads website and it seems like it’s actually a lot of work, which is kind of the opposite of what I want.

6. Will I look stupid in these sunglasses? Xmas is coming, and I do need some new sunglasses; those $2 ones I got at H&M years ago are getting wobbly on the foldy parts.

7. Aiieee, it’s late! Good night!

p.s.

maura @ 9:44 pm

Day 7 and so far this NaBloPoMo stuff is coming along okay. And just think how much easier it would be if I didn’t have homework to do, har.

way out

maura @ 9:42 pm

Of course I voted today, didn’t you? Though I must admit to a smidge of annoyance that we had to vote AGAIN this year, the third year in a row. But it’s probably mostly because I am still low-level sick (going on 10 days or so) and I have a bunch of schoolwork to do right now and thus could really have used a workday today rather than spending the day:

- Answering 1001 election-related questions from the peanut gallery, which I am ashamed to say tested my brainpower far more than they should have.

- Indulging 1002 requests for watching videos of jelly chus, looking at pictures of jelly chus, and killing jelly chus (wait, didn’t we FINISH that game recently? Yes, we did.).

- Enduring a screaming jumping fit when I would not buy him a smashy penny when we got to our local, tiny zoo RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE, instead insisting that he wait til a little later.

The school where we vote always has a bake sale, and since I’m a suckah I promised Gus we could get something. This year’s was a little slim but we did score some delicious red velvet cake* that we all shared after dinner. It was clearly homemade and had the perfect cake-to-frosting ratio (I’m a light-on-the-frosting gal, myself). Mmmm, cake. Lately I’ve been really craving cake for some reason, so this hit the spot.

* Red velvet cake is totally the it cake here in Brooklyn right now. We had it in its cupcake variant from Baked over the summer (they do it with a cinnamon frosting rather than the traditional cream cheese), and the newest bestest bakery in our hood also does a fine version. I’ll say it again: mmmm, cake. Though I’d prefer a carrot or pumpkin or caramel cake, really.

This year the school also had a Scholastic book fair. All my guilt about sending Gus to an all-lottery school (more about this another time) flew right up to the surface so of course I let Gus pick one book to buy, too. He picked this one, sure to become a timeless classic on feces. We haven’t read it yet but I am not so sure it was a good idea. Will keep you posted.

tired + low

maura @ 9:18 pm

Sometimes it is just very hard to be a parent.

(I know, newsflash, alert the media! But it’s my pity party, I can wallow in the obvious if I want to.)

This afternoon was hard. I know there’s the whole kindergartener-in-a-big-school thing and the long-day-at-school thing, and even the whole birthday’s-coming-up thing*, but some days I have a really hard time dealing with the falling-apart-at-pickup thing with good humor. Of course I realize he’s little and I’m big and should have more resilience, more backbone, more rope. But my rope gets short quickly sometimes, like today. My expectations of happy reunions, calls of “Hi Mom!” and excited responses to “how’s your day?” are not met. Then I yell and feel like a big meanie and beat myself up all night long. Good times!

* I read something once that said that kids tend to have grumpy times around birthdays and half-birthdays, which has been mostly true for Gus.

I think I will try using the car for pickup for the foreseeable future. That should help with the tiredness, at least.

getting better…

maura @ 2:40 pm

…but not there yet. So another day of small posting and topic borrowing from other places.

1. Like Jessie did yesterday, I have lately been fantasizing about getting rid of lots of stuff (ooo, exciting!). There is a lot around here that we just don’t use anymore. And it’s so much easier to keep the house clean with less crap around! Probably this is just some pre-holiday angst, as we enter the season of stuff. But I can’t wait ’til our building’s giant stoop sale next spring. I’ve got the two weeks in January before classes start reserved for some serious purging, woo hoo!

2. Like Gabe, I think the time has come for us to jettison Lost from our TV lineup, even though it’s a little less crowded now with Weeds’ ending for the season. I dunno, it just seems more and more clear as time goes on that there is NO master plan for the show. I think the writers are more confused than we are! What took the cake with last week’s episode is the introduction of newbie #1 and newbie #2 and their stilted, painful lines. PLUS the one-eyed pirate man in another hatch, WTF??? Lost, we are so OVER you.

Tea time! You should have some now, too, especially if you’re feeling a bit under the weather.

bah, sick

maura @ 8:31 pm

And that’s what I get for my trouble: apparently I am now sick. I’ve actually been feeling sort of crummy for a week now, but last night the coughing and body aches kicked it up a notch. I spent most of the day on the sofa so hopefully tomorrow will be better.

So no long-winded post for today, faithful readers. Just a few random notes:

- I’m sick of politics. Hurry up Tuesday!

- While I was at class Thursday night Jonathan and Gus beat the three puppet Ganons and the final real Ganon, which means they finished Wind Waker. We are all, strangely, a little sad.

Hmm, I can’t really think of anything else right now. Tonight’s fun includes getting Gus to bed (any minute now) and then curling up on the couch to watch BSG. And perhaps some medicinal liquor to soothe the throat.

and if you break my heart

maura @ 10:11 pm

After nearly two months, I think I have finally made some sort of Uneasy Truce with the commute to Gus’ new school. Or maybe it’s Resigned Acceptance. Either way I am spending far fewer braincycles stressing out about it, which can only be a good thing.

The craw-sticking fact of the matter is that it’s only about 2 miles from our house. But because of the way the subway is set up (mostly to go from the boroughs into Manhattan) *plus* the Gowanus Canal, which only has a few bridges over it, it’s really been a puzzle to figure out the best way to get from here to there and back again.

There is a city bus that gets us pretty close. But on that route the buses only run every half hour or so and if you miss it you’re sunk. There’s also a really complicated way to take the subway which involves switching trains in the most labor-intensive way: getting off the train, going up to the street and walking 2 blocks to a different train station. That’s about 200 stairs just to get him home in the afternoons.

Just this week we’ve reluctantly concluded that the best way to get him home in the afternoons is to drive. I have a complicated relationship with the car (which will have to wait for another day to discuss, because there are cookies to be eaten and Lost to be watched!) so this sort of feels like failure to me. On the other hand, when we drive I don’t have to endure the “I’m too tired to walk” whining, nor the begging for a cookie from the bakery, granola bars from the newsstand, or a hot dog from the cart.

Also this week, I’ve realized that the bus in the mornings is really kinda nice. It’s usually lovely and quiet on the way home (and sometimes on the way there, too). The route goes through some beautiful and interesting neighborhoods, and is slightly different each way (because the bridges over the canal are only one-way). And, even though it takes about 100 minutes total, it’s really not an unpleasant way to start the day.

Here’s a small sampling of what I saw on my bus ride this morning:

- 2 (maybe 3?) pieces of art by Swoon, 1 (2?) ripped, 1 not
- lots of trees in various fall colors
- a beautiful Carnegie-era branch library
- the South Brooklyn Casket Co.
- innumerable gorgeous brick townhouses and brownstones
- innumerable new condos being built, many ugly
- two giant inflated pumpkin/ghost Halloween decorations
- a small sailboat named Fat Cat
- fresh red graffiti that reads “i love you callie”
- a curious small awning with an art-deco-ish logo for Milso Industries
- a beautiful wild-and-hippy-looking community garden
- one of our favorite date night restaurants
- a store in the poshest part of the bus route called Classy Nails (would its opposite be Tacky Ho Nails?)
- the highest elevated section of subway track in the entire city

he could eat you with a fork and spoon

maura @ 10:55 pm

I am completely in love with my new librarytastic life, but I must admit that there are a few things I miss about my old job:

1. a paycheck
2. my coworkers
3. the (relatively) inexpensive + easy-to-obtain health + life insurance for me + my family

So we applied for life insurance recently. We filled out the forms and answered invasive questions over the phone and were told we would need to give blood and urine samples. I was expecting to have to go to a lab to donate my fluids but the other day we got a call that no, a nurse would come to us.

This set off a huge paranoia fest in my brain. I mean, who’s to say that the nurse who takes our blood + pee is REALLY affiliated with the insurance company? How do we know it’s not just someone walking in off the street (albeit with all the right equipment and paperwork)? Clearly I have watched one too many X-Files episodes or something*, but the whole thing just seems really really weird to me.

ANYway, today the nurse came. She was 3 hrs. late, so I really REALLY had to pee by the time she got here. I had to pee in a cup and pour it into two little vials. We had to take the trash out right then and there because we could totally see Gus saying “what’s that little cup for?” and reaching in to grab it. The nurse was not a good phlebotomist and now I have a bruise.

And I still don’t understand why they couldn’t have just sent us to a lab.

* Jonathan says I should mention “something about clones and doppelgangers and whatnot”, so I am. You know, how they could make those things of me with the blood samples.